# Question About The Anand Karaj



## ogar604 (Feb 1, 2008)

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh

I am a sikh guy marrying a catholic woman and my question pertains to the Anand Karaj.  Now first off we both want to appease both sides by doing whats right in both cultures, but the only problem we keep running into is that both her church and the gurdwara say each wedding should be done first.  Now I have heard of gurdwara ceremonies being done second, or even first and not signing the marriage license.  So my question is would the gurdwara see this as a marriage if we dont sign the marriage license and do the rest of the marriage ceremony?  All help in regards to this would be very much appreciated


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## Astroboy (Feb 1, 2008)

If I understand your question, you want to be socially accepted as husband and wife but not legally binded. 

Well you might as well explain your sincere intentions as to why you want such an arrangement. Society doesn't let go so fast. Because love as all about bringing up children and creating and maintaining relationships.
That can be seen in any way you want to view it but this is a fact of life. 

I wonder if a woman would want such an arrangement.


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## ogar604 (Feb 1, 2008)

well we do want to have the marriage legal but the thing is you can only sign one marriage license, but her church wont do the ceremony and will totally excommunicate her if we sign the licenses in the gurdwara, but the gurdwara is willing to do the ceremony and not sign the marriage license, again my only question is would sikhism see the marriage as bound if we do the ceremony and not sign the marriage license in the gurdwara?


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## Astroboy (Feb 1, 2008)

Sorry I misunderstood you in the beginning. 

I think the wedding ceremony according to Sikh way is socially accepted with or without a marriage license. You can get your license in the church so that she's not ex-communicated. Sikhism has no "controlling the masses" strategies. 

I would want to hear others' views as well.


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## ogar604 (Feb 1, 2008)

namjap said:


> Sorry I misunderstood you in the beginning.
> 
> I think the wedding ceremony according to Sikh way is socially accepted with or without a marriage license. You can get your license in the church so that she's not ex-communicated. Sikhism has no "controlling the masses" strategies.
> 
> I would want to hear others' views as well.


 

thanks for your input namjap and i too would love to hear others view on this as well. If we could get input from a granthi i think that would probably the best type of input.


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## Archived_Member_19 (Feb 1, 2008)

ogar ji

i am not aware how it happens in other countries but atleast in india, SGPC requires registration of marriage with SGPC and issues a marriage certificate, which is mandatory proof to be submitted for legal marriage registration, if the couple doesnot want to go through the route of a legal marriage in civil court.


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## ogar604 (Feb 1, 2008)

amarsangerha ji

the question is not about legality, but rather of if the sikh dharm recognizes the marriage as a marriage without the license, because the license will be signed when we do the other wedding ceremony.


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## Archived_Member_19 (Feb 1, 2008)

LOL  why do you question sikh dharm?  apologies for being blunt...  if you accept her as your wife, and both have anand karaj, understand its meaning and accept each other, what more is there?  acceptance of marriage is between you two. Legal affairs have no linkage to the emotional bond


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## spnadmin (Feb 2, 2008)

Wow ogar ji!

I think you are saying that you plan to marry in the Catholic Church and the priest will be signing the license.  That way your fiance won't be excommunicated.

There is a simpler way to do this. Have a civil marriage first -- with the judge or justice of the peace signing the license. Then get married in the gurdwara.

In the US marriage laws are state level laws, not federal. Everyone has to first go to the county court and apply for a license. Then you can either marry in a civil ceremony, or you can marry in a church, etc. 

Make arrangements for a civil ceremony. Get married by a judge or justice of the peace, who will sign the license. Then you go back to the courthouse and have the license registered. They explain everything to you.

if your fiance is a Catholic, yes, she will be excommunicated if she marries in a different church AND the minister or rabbi or granthi signs the license. But if you have the civil ceremony first,  you will at least be legally married. As for the Catholic Church -- there is no way around their canon laws. If you don't marry in the Catholic Church, then you are not married in the eyes of the Catholic Church. But at least your _fiance_ won't be excommunicated if there was a civil ceremony. She will just be "living in sin."  But think how less pressure there will be on everyone involved. 

In Europe everyone must have a civil ceremony before the religious ceremony. An official of the court signs the license. In the US either a judge or a religious figure like a minister can sign the license. But if it is a minister or priest then they have to have a registered number proving they are authorized to perform marriages.


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