# How Many Wives Did Guru Gobind Singh Ji Have?



## arshdeep88

Sat sri akal to all
hope all of you are doing well 

Forgive me for my stupid and idiotic question but sorry cant help it. 
Right from my childhood i have been told that guru gobind singh ji had 2 wives but different websites gives different account to this.
Some say it was just an incident of one person being given new name after marriage, so Mata jeeto and Mata sundri are one and the same.
On other websites i have seen people justifying that no Mata Jeeto G and Mata Sundri g were two different persons  and refer to two gurudwars built in the memory of mata Jeeto g and mata sundri g.

thing is its confusion for people like me who  just want to explore sikhism more and read onto the lives of Gurus and most of the time depend on net for research only.

your views will be greatly appreciated on the matter and if someone can answer with Authentic reference it will be of great help


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## love and peace

When Guru Granth Sahib ji teaches us to stay with only one spouse, no one else then how could Guru ji go against Guru Granth sahib ji??? When Guru Gobind Singh ji got married once why would he marry again??
I also believe that Guru Ji had one wife.
Read the answer from this online book..chapter 4 ,question 3

http://www.sikhmarg.com/english/list.html

http://www.sikhmarg.com/english/chapter04.html


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## arshdeep88

love and peace ji
thanks for replying and thanks for the links ill read them for sure and i do got to the point where the question is answered by the author the,same i have been studying in various websites
are we sure about the author's version? is it really authentic?
and  i will like to have additional information from you if you dont mind

where in sri guru granth sahib ji it says that you need to have only ONE spouse?
(i havent read all of guru granth sahib g )

and can you list the wives of 1st guru to last ( i am getting more stupid i know)?


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## spnadmin

It seems to me that Guru Gobind Singh had 2 wives, but only 1 wife at a time. Please correct me. Mata Sahib Kaur was NOT one of them.

I could use some clarification on the story that his first wife died, and he then remarried. This too could be folklore. 

Thanks love and peace ji for the link to SikhMarg.


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## arshdeep88

Perhaps that is the closest answer i could relate to sister ji

but after reading various websites mentioning how few of the gurus had more than one wives ,i haven't been able to trace anything except just two views.
i would like to think from another point if really having more than one wife was really wrong that time or are we reading too much into what's wrong or what's not ? (forgive me if am wrong)


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## spnadmin

arshdeep88 said:


> Perhaps that is the closest answer i could relate to sister ji
> 
> but after reading various websites mentioning how few of the gurus had more than one wives ,i haven't been able to trace anything except just two views.
> i would like to think from another point if really having more than one wife was really wrong that time or are we reading too much into what's wrong or what's not ? (forgive me if am wrong)



arshdeep ji

The story of polygamy among the Sikh Gurus comes up every so often. I too am aware of those web sites, but actually do not have the physical or mental energy to search for them right now. 

Having one wife was common among Hindus and Muslims at the time. Those flaky web sites are typically trying to re-invent Sikhism as a branch of Hinduism. From that core idea - Sikhs are Hindus - they then move onto the conclusion that one or more Gurus had more than one wife, practiced polygamy. That suits the agenda of those - there are so many of these groups any more - who would like to classify Sikhs as Hindus. Usually there is a political motive behind this, and confusing people is the first step toward shaking their confidence in their identity. 

They also promote the idea that Guru Arjan Dev and his wife could not conceive until a Hindu sex ritual was performed between Mata Ganga  and a famous yogi. I am not even going to repeat it. If you buy that it is a short hop, skip and jump to saying that SGGS is nothing more than a offshoot of vedic scripture. 

I am unaware of any reliable historical sources that establish polygamy among Sikh gurus.


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## arshdeep88

i do got your point and its also true many muslims  are taking advantage of this CONFUSION to allure people to their faiths


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## spnadmin

Just a little reflection from me. It is interesting how hukam works. Early this morning for no reason other than curiosity I decided to do some reading about conspiracy theories - how do they work and why do people believe them. This morning was well spent because the story of Guru Gobind Singh and his harem of wives is part of a broader conspiracy theory.


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## Luckysingh

Difficult to get multiple sources with the same answer with regards to this issue.

I know that many people accept that there were two wives but then they can't reason if it were to do with no offspring with the 1st.
-Because the same theories seem to explain that Baba Ajit singh ji was not from the same mother as the other three !!

At the end of the day, i think it is one of those questions where the personal answer changes depending on the stage we are at on the path.
The answer does not make any of us a better sikh in any way.
At the moment my personal understanding is the one wife and two names theory.
However, this may change in the coming future depending upon my development stage.
Whatever belief comes across in the best of our interests in terms of development is the one that we should choose. Remembering that the needs of our interests will change with time and so may the answers to such questions.
Just try and find that personal 'comfort zone' would be my personal recommendation.


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## love and peace

First of all I do not have a great knowledge regarding Guru Granth sahib ji because i am also a person going slowly on my way, but what i have leaned till now is that again and again Guru Granth sahib Ji tecahes us to stay away from our 5 enemies...which include "LUST" and even thinking about another persona except your spouse/ person who have commited to would be categorized under "LUST" so just question yourself was Guru ji practise Lust The King who fought for the TRUTH how could He practice such things like marrying another woman while he already had his wife?
I will definitely come back with some hymns from Guru Granth Sahib Ji teaching us to remain with one and not to think of "paraye"  other than one's spouse/ or the person they have committed with....the rest stories keep coming on from centuries and decades and all how much they are true or changed or however, instead of understanding these confusions it would be better to Love God and Guru from the heart trusting that they always practiced the TRUTH. This online book is very nice, i loved it would recommend anyone to go through it for the doubts we carry in our heads.


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## Harry Haller

Personally, I found the Gurus to have used their lives to set an example to the rest of us, actions, words, writings all there to inspire us to live our lives as they did. 

For this simple reason, I find it highly unlikely that any of our Gurus had anymore than one wife at any one time. 

Again, personally speaking, I believe that names get changed when women marry, as still happens today, and that explains the multitude of names being bandied about.


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## arshdeep88

One  point  came up in one of the website listed below
http://www.sikhawareness.com/index.php/topic/2472-why-did-guru-gobind-singh-have-more-than-one-wife/
it talks about two separate samadhi's for mata sundri ji and mata jeeto g
if that is true then there can't be two different samadhi's for one person only(between i am also wondering since when did  the culture of buliding samadhi came up in sikhism or does it happens?)
one being in delhi and one in anandpur sahib

mata sundri ji's samadhi it says is  in delhi and mata jeeto g in anandpur


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## singhbj

How many marriages did Guru Gobind Singh Ji have?

http://www.sikhanswers.com/sikh-history-personalities/how-many-marriages-tenth-guru/


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## arshdeep88

Love and peace ji i agree with you that we should stay away from lust and the 5 enemies as mentioned in Guru granth sahib g

But is LUST the only reason for marrying a person?


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## love and peace

There is a difference between Love and Lust....For me Lust is when you have sexual feelings or such physical feelings for one without any commitment.....BUT if you have sexual feelings/Love feelings  for your loved one then for me that is not lust but love pure love which is also natural. 
I also wanna love and be loved for that I would marry a nice guy according to me that would be categorized under love  BUT if i develop such feelings for someone else other than my loved one that would be categorized under Lust.
so according to me not LUST but LOVE should be the reason to marry.  and i remember i gotta get the hymns.


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## Harry Haller

0ne can still have lustful feelings for a loved one, for a partner, that are outside of love. 

A husband that forces himself on his wife is acting out of lust not love, marriage is no validator of lust

A husband that shares his love with his wife should not be confused with a lusty husband who expects dinner on the table and sex on tap, there are differences.


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## Tejwant Singh

> A husband that forces himself on his wife is acting out of lust not love, marriage is no validator of lust



One calls that a rape.


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## Gyani Jarnail Singh

Sikh "History" is mostly UNRELIABLE. The One and ONLY LITMUS TEST is Gurbani INSIDE SGGS our One and Only Guru authenticated by Guru Nanak Ji, Guur Arjun ji and Guru Teg bahadur Ji, Guru GOBIND SINGH JI final seal in 1708 Nanded. Any "history" that FAILS this litmus test is FAIL.PERIOD. ALL GURUS are the SAME JYOT- Nanak JYOT and Nanak Ji had only one wife - mata Sulakhnni Ji....Guru Angad Ji - mata Khivi Ji, and so on...Guru teg bahadur Ji - mata Gujree Ji and Guru Gobind Singh ji also one wife. Just look at how utterly RIDICOLOUS Some sikh history is ..Guru Har rai ji is supposedly married to SEVEN SISTERS at one time..the "fairy tale" writer didnt even consider the AGE factor dates etc..becasue the "youngest" sister is theoratically aged a few months when Guru ji is supposed to have married her...BUT the SANT Bbabaamhapurash *BHARAMAGYANIS* continue to beat that dead horse never the less...Certain vested interests want to make our Gurus MYTHICAL...just like Bhagwan Krishan who supposedly had a FEW THOUSAND Gopis !! But Our GRUS are NOT MYTHICAL..they are REAL !! and they Lived life according to the strict principles in SGGS. Period.:japosatnamwaheguru:


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## inder preet

i have also studied somewhere that guru gobind singh ji had four wives but not at one time one died then he married another iin this way he had four wives.


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## Harry Haller

inder preet said:


> i have also studied somewhere that guru gobind singh ji had four wives but not at one time one died then he married another iin this way he had four wives.


 
yes, that makes sense, after all, the tenth master had a quiet peaceful life, although one has to say, having three wives die on you is pretty unlucky!

One wonders where he found the time to lead the Khalsa with all these marriages and deaths going on. 

Why are we so intent on turning our heros into clones of Vedic mythology? Do we not want to feel left out because other religions have such pillars of manliness, is one wife just too boring? does it give the wrong impression? 

Perhaps in Sikhism the traits of loyalty, love, singular commitment, are just too mundane for some.


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## Kanwaljit.Singh

> is one wife just too boring? Does it give the wrong impression?



rofl


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## love and peace

harry haller said:


> 0ne can still have lustful feelings for a loved one, for a partner, that are outside of love.
> 
> A husband that forces himself on his wife is acting out of lust not love, marriage is no validator of lust
> 
> a husband that shares his love with his wife should not be confused with a lusty husband who expects dinner on the table and sex on tap, there are differences.



i totally agree with you.


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## Luckysingh

The strong believers of the 2 wive theory insist that ''why is there 2 gurdwaras in memory of Mata jito ji and Mata Sundri ji in different locations???''
Because of these sacred places and historical significances that come with them, therefore they are certain that the said were 2 completely different beings and could never have been the same person !!

However, if we just start relying on built shrines as pure evidence of historical facts then we also have question of Hemkund sahib which is where Dasam pita is said to have resided in the previous birth.
You should note that Hemkund Sahib has in this century been said to have been in 2 different locations, - 1st they got one location but later changed their minds and settled for another.
(What the hell????)
Anyway we shouldn't criticize the place because it is still a Guru khar and Guru shabad resides there, Therefore, as a guru khar it is worth the journey to visit and matha tek, BUT don't get too attached to the alleged significance or past life theories.
This goes for the 2 wive shrines as well that help to distort historical facts.


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## Harry Haller

> Anyway we shouldn't criticize the place because it is still a Guru khar and Guru shabad resides there,


 
I disagree, Guru Ghar is everywhere, Guru Shabad resides everywhere, Hemkunt is no more relevant than Disneyworld. In fact its worse, it stands for the Vedic elements in Sikhism and is a beacon for those with such tendencies,.


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## spnadmin

Why does this story of 1, 2 or 3 wives continually surface? 

I just did a quick check of Internet sources and they are all contradictory. Writers go to great lengths to document why it was really only 1, why it could have been 2, or why it had to be 3. One source, widely quoted and considered reputable regarding Sikhi, stated that the 10th Guru had 2 wives - giving historical references. The site then contradicted its very own account by linking to another page on the same site, which went to great lengths to claim he had 3 wives. The term always used is co-wives (why that?). I was astonished by the sites that explored this issue ... with verve and tones of authority. The question ranks with another puzzling web driven discussion of Guru Gobind's Singh's physique and shoe size. 

It is no wonder the question comes up and no wonder one becomes confused. 

Why would his domestic arrangements figure into the scheme of things important? In ardaas, when we are asked to remember Guru Gobind Singh, what do I remember about him? What do you remember about him?


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## Harry Haller

> Why would his domestic arrangements figure into the scheme of things important?


 
because they prove he lived as he talked.

A quote attributed to the 10th Master goes something along 'those that even dream of another woman other than their wife shall burn', now this to me confirms that a man should hold his wife in the highest esteem and not even be unfaithful even in mind, to then do a Henry the VII'th and then get married twice, or even three times is in my mind completely contradictory, and belittles the position of a wife. As always there is an agenda to the two or three wives brigade, all animals are equal, but some are more equal than others, again that is not my understanding of the Gurus, they went to great lengths to practice what they preached, they went to great lengths to show us that they would not be deviated from what they felt was the truth, even if it meant death. The truth is that you can only love one woman as your wife, the suggestion otherwise makes a complete mockery of Anand Karaj. 



> In ardaas, when we are asked to remember Guru Gobind Singh, what do I remember about him? What do you remember about him?


 
that he fought for what he believed in and did not compromise


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## Ishna

For what it's worth I've attached the footer of page four of Max Arthur MacCauliffe's _The Sikh Religion,_ volume 5.


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## kds1980

What theory people have to prove that sixth guru hargobind ji had one one wife?


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## Harry Haller

kds1980 said:


> What theory people have to prove that sixth guru hargobind ji had one one wife?


 

Well, my dads calendar that he bought from Amritsar says so!
mind you, it also says that the Tenth Master wrote the DG, andI think something must have happened at the printers because August, instead of Bhai Mani ji having his fingers cut off, shows Winnie the Pooh eating honey, but in any case, I have the utmost faith in dads calendar, after all, it was bought in Amritsar........


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## spnadmin

Ishna, let's  keep that page grab from Macauliffe handy so that we don't have to root around looking for it in the future when this surfaces again. Macauliffe consulted with a number of local scholars of his century who had more reasons to push the more than one wife story than the other way around. It appears they did not accept the 2-wife story..

Harry I hope you realize that I am invoking the role of devil's advocate when I ask questions that seem to have obvious answers. They need to get out into the open as underlying issues and questions, otherwise the stream of opinion becomes a flood of words.

The story has the quality of gossip to it. The story is "dropped"  and  a chitty chatty kind of discussion follows. When there is so much disagreement, based on cultural lore, then the co-wife theorists really need to retreat.


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## spnadmin

kds1980 said:


> What theory people have to prove that sixth guru hargobind ji had one one wife?



The story of Guru Hargobind is even more extreme. Regardless of guru story, *no one so far has been trying to prove *the 1 wife story. They are trying to prove the 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 wife stories are wrong. The theory being that once again the mahants are on the upswing even on the internet trying to turn Sikh gurus into leaders of a reconstituted Hindu sect. There are entire web sites promoting mahant "philosophy" with the name "Sikh" included in their site name, and many other web sites written by individuals that have an interest in clouding up the unique contribution of the Sikh Gurus.


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