# Sikh Marriage Ceremony - Anand Karaj Or Metaphor For Relationship With God?



## Arvind (Dec 7, 2004)

Gurmukh Pyareo,

GuruFateh ji.

While reading Guru Granth Sahib ji (773, 774), I realize I dont understand the meaning of the laava'n. As a married man, I look forward to meanings of the laava'n. What is Guru ji saying about marriage, and married behaviour? 

During my marriage, Granthi ji did explain the meaning, however, I dont recollect those now. So, could someone please spare time to explain the meaning of those, or point to appropriate resource.

Thanks in advance.

Regards.


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## Prabjyot Kaur (Dec 9, 2004)

*Re: Meaning of Marriage.*

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki Fateh

The Lavaan hymn of the Fourth Guru Sri Guru Ram Das Ji, was not originally meant for the purpose of performing the marriage ceremony. It has a very deep meaning and pertains to the *relationship between man and God*, and not merely that of husband and wife. For translation, one can refer to Sri Guru Granth Sahib at http://www.gurugranthdarpan.com/0773.html.

        The main theme of the first _laav_ is to achieve proclivity towards a sinless life by remembering God. This will lead to your becoming free of fear, save for the Lord's fear in your mind, to remove ego by pure love for Him, and feeling His presence everywhere in the second _laav_. The theme of the third _laav_ is to achieve a state of renunciation while living in this world like a lotus flower growing in the water. This will finally, as per fourth _laav_, lead to equipoise, avoiding extremes in life and achieving union with God. 

Using the metaphor of husband and wife and blissful conjugal life, the couple is enjoined to adopt the path indicated in the _Lavaan_ for spiritual fulfilment. This is applicable not only to the couple, but to the whole of humanity._ Anand Karaj_ is a sacred ceremony and should be solemnised in this spirit.


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## Arvind (Dec 9, 2004)

*Re: Meaning of Marriage.*

The meaning of the four laava'n is so important. If one aspires to understand and implement those in married lives also, it makes the bond so good. Personally, I take the human husband wife as a first step or shall I say rehearsal, before I may become blessed to the ultimate unity.

Thanks Prabjyot ji.


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## Hardip Singh (Jul 8, 2009)

*Re: Sikh Marriage Ceremony - Anand Karaj*

[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Dear Veer Arvind jeo,[/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]At the time of the Anand Karaj four 'Lawaan' are taken around Guru Granth Sahib to signify that while these two bodies are getting married, simultaneously two souls are also being wedded to the Shabad Guru. Henceforth to be blessed with the eternal bliss the pre-condition is that one is not to go out of the orbit of Guru Granth Sahib. Now the 'Lawaan' in Suhi Rag given by Guru Ram Das ji has four stanzas. The essence and central idea for eternal bliss as has been given in each stanza can be enumerated briefly as follows: [/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]First Lawn[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਪਰਵਿਰਤੀ ਕਰਮ [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Second Lawn [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਨਿਰਮਲੁ ਭਉ ਪਾਇਆ [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Third Lawn [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਉਪਜੈ ਮਨਿ ਬੈਰਾਗੁ ਜੀਉ [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Fourth Lawn [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਪਾਇਆ ਪ੍ਰਭੁ ਅਵਿਨਾਸੀ[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Unlike the philosophy of Shastras dividing the life span into different Ashrams the gurmat does not put it to different compartments. If one is to get wedded to Him, the life has to be treated as one composite unit. In this the person has to get himself involved in the affairs of the family in a such a manner that being in the family life he has to become a monk. This is the art of life which has been preached in the 'Lawaan'.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]The first Lawn tells us that the person has to get himself involved actively in the affairs of the world. He is not to abdicate the social and moral responsibilities by renouncing the world. To attain this the the person is to adhere to Dharma. This can be done only by avoiding sin. Crime is physically outraging or harming some person or property whereas the same thing is done vicariously without actually perpetuating it is called sin. Thus murdering, outraging the modesty of someone or looting a person is a crime but enjoying these in day dreams is sin. The first stage of committing a crime is sin. A person who is not a sinner cannot be a criminal. The State is neither capable nor committed to eradicate the sin. This can be done only be teachings of Moral Values or Dharma. Thus for achieving the crime free society it has to be made a sinless society.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]The second lawn tell us that the Satguru has been so benevolent that He had helped us meet the Lord. Herein the relationship of the Guru and Waheguru with Sikh has been explained. The daughter, the Sikh prays to her father, Guru, that bless me with such deeds and manners that I should be accepted by my groom the God. [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਬਾਬਾ ਮੈ ਵਰੁ ਦੇਹਿ ਮੈ ਹਰਿ ਵਰੁ ਭਾਵੈ ਤਿਸ ਕੀ ਬਲਿ ਰਾਮ ਜੀਉ [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]( [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਪੰਨਾ[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]: 773) This has ushered in the pious fear. It is the pious fear not the awful fear. Because we are scared and feared from a bull or even a snake. But the fear which has affection and love is a pious fear, like the fear of the father, the mutual fear of husband and wife or the fear of a good teacher. The clergy gives the fear but the Guru gives us the pious fear.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]The third lawn tells us that though the blessings of the blessed ones I have acquired the Bairag or renunciation in my heart and mind. Here the Bairag, renunciation or detachment is not of a Sanyasi or Sufi. The Sanyasi when he renounces the world, he even renounces the love. This makes him so aloof from the world that he becomes a burden on the society. Likewise the Sufi gets himself so much involved in the love that he sees even the love stories of the society [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਇਸ਼ਕਿ ਮਜਾਜੀ [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]as a means to understand and emulate the love for God [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ਇਸ਼ਕਿ ਹਕੀਕੀ[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]. But here he also abdicates his primary duty towards the family or the society. The gurmat wants a balanced life with Sahaj as the binding force.[/FONT]
[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]The Fourth Lawn tells us that we have found the eternal Lord Gurmukh as the groom. The whole process has been completed with His grace and desire and that He has found a place in my heart. This is the essence of the Lawaan, Parkarma and should be understood in this sense[/FONT]


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## spnadmin (Jul 8, 2009)

*Re: Sikh Marriage Ceremony - Anand Karaj*

Really beautiful Hardip ji -


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## Hardip Singh (Jul 8, 2009)

*Re: Sikh Marriage Ceremony - Anand Karaj*



Narayanjot Kaur said:


> Really beautiful Hardip ji -


 
Thanks. But these I have taken from reserch work of G S Lamba. Credit goes to him. I just pasted the lines from his origional essay on Parikarma or Laavan. However, Shabad Gyan is to be spred in this world, from where so ever we find. Guru fateh.


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## Randip Singh (Jul 30, 2017)

*Re: Meaning of Marriage or Metaphor for Relatioship with God?*



Prabjyot Kaur said:


> Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki Fateh
> 
> The Lavaan hymn of the Fourth Guru Sri Guru Ram Das Ji, was not originally meant for the purpose of performing the marriage ceremony. It has a very deep meaning and pertains to the *relationship between man and God*, and not merely that of husband and wife. For translation, one can refer to Sri Guru Granth Sahib at http://www.gurugranthdarpan.com/0773.html.
> 
> ...



Exactly the point I was going to make.

This has less to to with marriage but more to do with the relationship with God.

This is an example of the metaphor of the relationship between husband and wife used to describe union with God:

http://www.srigranth.org/servlet/gurbani.gurbani?Action=AdvancedSearchGurbani


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## Dalvinder Singh Grewal (Aug 1, 2017)

Hardip Singh said:


> *Re: Sikh Marriage Ceremony - Anand Karaj*
> 
> 
> 
> Thanks. But these I have taken from reserch work of G S Lamba. Credit goes to him. I just pasted the lines from his origional essay on Parikarma or Laavan. However, Shabad Gyan is to be spred in this world, from where so ever we find. Guru fateh.



Lavan are meant for the marriage of two Gursikhs. Before marriage the granthi asks both two partake Amrit. Amrit does not mean just performance of a ritual. They have to be actually attached to the Guru here SGGS and its teaching and live their life based on the guidance of Guru. Every world of lavan is a step towards making the two the Gurmukhs. They thus are required to become Gurmukhs. What we have done is that we have made this as a ritual to be performed for marriage ceremony and to be forgotten thereafter. If we would have adopted lavan to become Gursikhs, Sikhs would have been the most sought after world over for settling examples for life.


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## sukhsingh (Aug 1, 2017)

dalvindersingh grewal said:


> Lavan are meant for the marriage of two Gursikhs. Before marriage the granthi asks both two partake Amrit. Amrit does not mean just performance of a ritual. They have to be actually attached to the Guru here SGGS and its teaching and live their life based on the guidance of Guru. Every world of lavan is a step towards making the two the Gurmukhs. They thus are required to become Gurmukhs. What we have done is that we have made this as a ritual to be performed for marriage ceremony and to be forgotten thereafter. If we would have adopted lavan to become Gursikhs, Sikhs would have been the most sought after world over for settling examples for life.


But one can be a gurmukh without taking amrit surely?


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