# Divorce



## justosh (Jun 10, 2012)

hello all,

Recently I have been hearing that divorce is against the will of God. so my question is, if God knows that we will make mistakes (and marriage to the wrong person maybe one) why are people advising that divorce is against his will.

Do you think its because of culture, status or just they want control?

I welcome people from all faiths and beliefs to comment, the more the better!


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## findingmyway (Jun 10, 2012)

Here is some food for thought
http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/sikh-youth/268-divorce-and-sikhism.html
http://www.sikhphilosophy.net/sikh-sikhi-sikhism/28983-on-divorce.html

In my personal opinion, divorcees being outcast is totally a cultural issues. In extreme circumstances I see nothing wrong with divorce. However, the reasons for divorce should be checked carefully. Too many people use it as an easy get out clause because either they have unrealistic expectations of what a relationship is and can't make compromises or they don't want to put in the effort on making a marriage work.


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## Archived_member15 (Jun 10, 2012)

This is an important question brother Justosh ji peacesign
Thank you for asking. 

In my religious tradition, Catholicism there are two different but equally valid viewpoints on divorce: Western (Roman) Catholic and Eastern (Byzantine) Catholic. 

Roman Catholicism does not allow for divorce although it does make room for at times a very liberal, flexible understanding of annulment. Eastern Catholicism, on the other hand, does permit divorce out of _mercy _even though it upholds the eternal nature of marriage as an _ideal _always. 

So for myself being a Catholic of the Roman Rite yet with Eastern Catholic sympathies, this presents something of a dilemna, how two traditions within the same religion, with equal validity and of equal age, can be both true. 

In this respect, I go with the Eastern Catholics. Divorce should never be a light matter. Marriage is a sacrament, it is a union not only of bodies nor merely a ritual or contract/property laws but a true spiritual union of souls who commit themselves to each other so as to be companions on the path towards union with God. No two human beings are closer than spouses. They are eyes, ears, legs and much more else besides to each other. When a couple make those promises to each other, they make them for life before God and what God has joined should never be divided, for God is a God of Unity not of division. 

Nevertheless we live in an imperfect human world and are imperfect people. Only God is perfect and simple and whole in Himself. We are in the _process of becoming one with God. _During this journey, things do wrong sometimes badly, and just as God is infinitely merciful we too must have mercy on people for the difficult, at times painful circumstances which result in the breaking of marital promises. Sometimes a couple, even after much effort and the desire to stay together, find themselves unable too and indeed their union may actually be causing decline in their spiritual health and become a barrier to the spiritual progress of both. 

Divorce is always an evil but in very extreme circumstances it can be a necessary evil, and there are always guiltless parties ie a wife whose husband has committed adultery, and she is left while he goes off with the other woman. She deserves the same right to happiness as he, especially given the fact that she did no wrong in the breaking of the marriage relationship. 

So in essence: 

- The ideal is the eternal unity of the married couple until "death do them part" 
- We must always try to keep a marriage going 
- If all attempts fail, and in extreme circumstances, great mercy and compassion is needed to allow the couple or the guiltless partner to marry again and have happiness. 

That's my thoughts :motherlylove:


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## Gyani Jarnail Singh (Jun 10, 2012)

EK Oankaar is IN "marriage" just as much as He is in "Divorce"..its HIS HUKM in BOTH. IF we only made the same effort we would be happy in marriage or divorce..it doesnt make a difference to HIM..Dosh na kahoon devohn.:angryyoungsingh:


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## SaintSoldier1699 (Jun 10, 2012)

Marriage is a deep commitment which quite a few people take very lightly.

In essence if both parties understand the seriousness in the commitments made to each other divorce is never needed - this is a perfect situation but we live in an imperfect world.

Thus, as humans we make mistakes, rush into things, think all is very rosey but when reality strikes we look for an easy escape route. 

I don't feel divorce is against God's will, its just part of life as we become more fickle and superficial in our needs, it depicts the strength/weakness in the bond of marriage.


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## Luckysingh (Jun 10, 2012)

In very simple terms, we should not destroy what the creator has created.
This means marriage as well. Giving you a bride or husband in the eyes of God is similar to the creator giving you a child.  
Like I said, in Very Simple terms, this is how it comes across as wrong and against the will of God.

If I agree or not is slightly different.
 I agree with Findingmyway ji, that many use it is the easy way out. In extreme circumstances it is usually necessary such as violence or bullying and physical harm leading to death. But even most of these women(usually) stay put and quiet and try to make it work, which in turn results in the partner getting more 'chammalled' and violent.


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